You Want to go to Thailand, aye?

$300 later, I had a plane ticket on Air Asia Airlines. I wanted to go find out what this full moon party was  about after watching a Youtube video. 

The first exposure to fear was on the way to the hostel. Note: I landed at midnight. I walk through arrivals and meet a taxi driver holding a sign with my name on it. Fine. He proceeds to take me to a taxi. Fine. 

Bridge at the start of Chao Phraya River ride

The ride lasted an hour, he never spoke once. His eyes looked half mast. I was so scared I made little grunts and coughs to make sure he was awake.

The ride ended on a bustling street, I  got out thinking, "Where the fuck am I". He aggressively takes my bags down a dim lit alley. I follow nervously.  On the left we pass a bar with people drinking and having a good time.  


It is a city that never sleeps. My thoughts are interrupted when I set upon this golden lit, serene foyer with tropical plants and cascading artificial waterfalls. As I read the Welcome to Wild Orchid Villas sign, I notices a few sexually explicit statues of elephants making love. 


Room to myself, a flower folded towel counterbalances the open shower bathroom set-up. I am reminded that this is a hostel by the sound of leaking water and wood boarded windows. Well that was quite an entrance as I finally change into some dry, excuse me, dryer clothes. 

I had booked a tour with a company called Thaintro to take me around for the first 10 days. For $550 it included accommodation, transportation, admission to  national parks and the charismatic guide Charlie.

Good deal for me since I had never been out of the US or Mexico. 

Supposedly only Thai people are immune
to bathe and play in the river

Bought a few things from this lovely soul.
She sells souvenirs and of course beer along the river.
To stay cool she hangs out under the elevated walkways. 

THIS is the LAND OF THE FREE.

The one fact I remember Charlie, my 'group leader', telling me about Thailand. I was sitting on a boat in the Chao Phraya River smack dab in Bangkok.  Dirtier than your dead dogs water bowl.

Myself and the other 23 kids pulled up to our first temple. A wobbly dock on top of the murky water, this is going to fun. Walking fast in order to keep my balance I jump off the ponga type vessel. 

Old abandon house that caught my attention, look at those power lines. 

Wat Arun Rajwararam (Temple of Dawn)

A few gold buddhas greet you with open palms. The guides tell us that if we land a gold coin in the palm then we are blessed with good luck in our future. Failed.

Across a cement pathway and up the stairway to heaven, I climb. Each step is steeper and thinner then the next. The sense of danger in a foreign country is awakened once again.

Some of the steepest stairs EVER!

Downtown Bangkok in the distance to the right

The sweat was emitting from all over my body. The humidity is so high that your eyeballs feel glossy. The air rests all around you like a personal cloud of warm moisture.

Now we had to cross the river, which seemed like a mission but what I was about to do next was scarier. We had to dart through traffic on one of the busiest streets. With Charlie parting traffic like Moses parting the Red Sea we safely made it to Wat Pho. 

I advise you go down backwards

Dried Fish, smells lovely. 

They will stop for you I swear. OK Charlie. 

Wat Pho

Home to the world's largest lying Buddha.  You might have seen it in the beginning of the movie The Beach. Buddha's feet and the detailed murals on the walls were my favorite parts. 

There are a lot of rules dealing with the feet in Thailand, I'm not sure if it comes from the culture or the religion but here are a few examples: 

•   Most monks do not wear shoes. 

•   You do not wear shoes when you enter Thai houses & some businesses. 

•   You do not wear shoes when you enter the inside of a temple. 

•   You are not supposed to show the bottoms of your feet to a Buddhist shrine.

Worlds largest laying Buddha at the WAT PHO TEMPLE
It is the largest and oldest temple in Bangkok.
He was 15 meter high and 46 long.

Next we came upon a smaller temple, that had nearly 100 replicas of the same Buddha. Each Buddha was a different shade of gold from the wear and tear of time.

Restored B

Ratchet B

Grand Royal Palace. I got some meditation in :)

Temple time ends and I experience my first Tuk-Tuk ride back to the hostel. It is a motorbike that has a bench seat with covering and goes at a ridiculous rate of speed. FUN!

Intricate wood carving